It has been a roller-coaster of a week, so I'm just now getting around to providing an update!
My 12.5 week check-up went really well on Monday. Here's how it went. My husband and 5 year old son were there with me. First, a younger resident-type doc came in and asked how I was doing, showed me the xrays, etc. He seemed a bit nervous and didn't seem too "schooled" on PAO's, but that was ok because I knew the "real deal" would be talking to me later. :-) This younger doc asked "can I see you walk?". I said, "um, really? Are you sure?". Afterall, I have not even TRIED to walk since my surgery in July. I gave it a whirl ... and though wobbly, I walked around a little in the room! My son was thrilled!! This doc told me the outer edge of my hip (by one of the breaks) had some extra bone healing on the outside that we would have to keep an eye on. Not sure what that means, or what it "could" mean later on ... he didn't explain ...
So then we waited for Dr. Kregor to come in. As to the xrays, all of the load-bearing bones seem to be healing nicely, and there is a non-load bearing bone (inside the pelvic cavity, perhaps by the tailbone) that has not healed but he said I could start weening off my 1 crutch!!! I was ecstatic. I am to continue PT for another 7-8 weeks until I see him again, and was told as to the wobblyness and range of motion that it could take up to a year before I'm 100%. I am still having low back pain and hip flexor/groin pain when lifting my knee or crossing it over to put socks on, but I guess that will just go away with time. It was still good to hear it from Dr. Kregor that there's no huge concern, just takes time. Whew.
So, I had my son carry my 1 crutch out of the building ... and I walked (well, limped). I was holding back the tears (not of pain, of JOY) all the way to the car. What freedom! What elation! My hip area and upper thigh was really sore while I was walking, but it was ok! I realized that while I thought I was doing about 75% weight bearing with 1 crutch, that wasn't the case. I didn't remember what 100% was until I actually started to walk on it ... and then realized I have a long way to go on strengthening those muscles. On the way to the car, my son told me in regards to not using a crutch "Kathryn is going to be SOO surprised!".
When I got to work I was really wishing I had remembered to bring my cane in, but nonetheless decided to just "walk" in. I was turning heads left and right, and my team was very excited for me! They could see the smile on my face as it was beaming with happiness and joined in on the happiness with me. I limped for the rest of the day, but thought all in all this was ok and I would enjoy resting when I got to bed that night!
I went to pick up my 3 year old daughter from school. I walked in, and she immediately stood there and just looked at me for a minute. She got a big smile on her face and said "Mommy? Where's your cwutch?". I told her I didn't need it anymore, and she got real excited ... turned to her teacher and said "My Mommy can walk!". The late-afternoon teacher in the room didn't know what she was talking about, since she doesn't really know me, but I knew. My heart melted. Kathryn and I held hands all the way to the car (which is not something you can do while on crutches). I will never forget that moment.
At home Monday night, I REALLY enjoyed walking around the kitchen helping to get dinner ready. I was amazed at how much faster I could get things ready when I had 2 hands free versus 1! John enjoyed me helping as well, I think. :-) Again, it was nice to be a little more mobile. Going up and down stairs (using the rail, of course) was also surprisingly easy.
I wake up Tuesday morning and head over for PT. I had the cane in the car, knowing I would need it at work ... yet didn't carry it into PT. They were all surprised to see me walk in! It felt really good. I started my 10 minutes on the stationary bike as usual, then proceed to the table to do my leg lift exercises while lying down. I did 20 straight leg lifts from my back. Yeeeah. Then rolled onto my left side, to do the leg lifts with my right leg and was told to do 20. When I got to number 16, I heard 2 quick pops and immediately lowered my leg. Now, I've heard some occasional snap/crackle/pops in my right hip area before since surgery, but since they never hurt ... I figured it was normal. These 2 pops were NOT normal, and were VERY painful. I told my therapist what happened, generally where it was, and we moved on to other exercises to try and isolate what I "could" do versus what I "couldn't" do. We were able to do some other exercises, but I could NOT do anything standing (at least nothing putting weight on my right leg) without huge pain.
She put me in a closed-door room, and tried some negatively charged compound on these electrode pad things to try and calm the muscle down. She put 2 pads on me, one in the groin area and one further up the hip, and zapped me for about 10 minutes. These pads had some sort of anti-inflammatory medication inside it that was supposed to draw itself down into the muscle. Along with that, she wrapped my hip up with ice while that was going on. As the day went on, I found it didn't help the pain. And wouldn't you know, I didn't have a crutch in the car ... just the cane. I was in so much pain walking around even with the cane that I left work early and worked from home ... tail between my legs ... angry that I had done something and set myself back ... and worried that something was horribly wrong.
I emailed Dr. Kregor about this, and he didn't seem too concerned that it was a significant muscle tear, and to take it easy for a week or so and also cut back on PT for a bit. It's now Friday, and I think it's actually feeling better. I have swallowed my pride and have been constantly using the 1 crutch again, and while walking I will allow myself to put a little more weight on the right side. There is still muscle soreness that wraps around from the top of my thigh around to the back of my hip, but I'm being cognizant of the pain and being gradual on putting a little more weight on it. I will probably hold off on PT next week, just to make SURE everything is ok, before we hit it again with weights and strengthening. Once again, it was such a relief to get the email from Dr. Kregor ... as I know nothing about muscles and bones and what is serious and what isn't.
I have had a few friends remind me in the last few days that I have had major surgery and that it takes time to heal. I've never had to take THIS long to heal from ANYTHING (of course, the only other surgeries I've had were 2 c-sections), and my patience is truly being tested. It's hard to be patient with something like recovering from hip surgery when you have a full time job, 2 small children who are active, and when you have other obligations outside of work. It has really been hard to keep my head up and realize how far I've come (thanks, SuSu and Mom for the reminder). I have to keep praying that God will keep me strong (mentally as well as physically) and will give me the patience that I've run out of in order to keep a steady pace of beginning to walk again and not try to rush it. Heaven knows I don't want another setback ...
I'm hoping that perhaps later this weekend ... or early next week ... I'll muster up the courage to try to use the cane again. Just have to make sure I don't damage those muscles. At this point I think I can recognize "bad" muscle pain versus "good" muscle pain! The "good" muscle pain is pain that exudes itself as "I'm weak". "Bad" muscle pain seems to be the kind that is sharp and says "get off me!!!". :-)
Day by day ... gotta "stay the course" ... "slow and steady" ... (in the words of one of my favorite StarTrek captains, Cpt. Jean Luc Picard)
Friday, October 23, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
12 weeks and who's counting?
Me! Counting every single day I might be closer to walking and feeling normal again.
Monday, October 19th I see Dr. Kregor for my 12.5 week follow up. At this point I'm probably 75% weight bearing, via one crutch, and hoping Mondays xrays show the bone breaks have finally healed.
It has been amazing to walk with no hip pain or discomfort whatsoever. What was not expected was the continued hip flexor muscle pain I feel when lifting my leg to get it into the car, into bed, or when trying to cross my leg to put a sock on.
I also continue to be plagued with unbearable low back pain after standing for more than 5 minutes, changing positions in bed at night, and sitting up after I've been lying down. I started taking Mobic for a week, an anti-inflammatory friend of mine that I take whenever sciatic nerve pain pops up unexpectedly, but it doesn't seem to be doing any good. I am not having any sciatic nerve pain, just total lumbar pain from left to right and everything inbetween. The mobic I have is a year or two old ... Wonder if that has something to do with the lack of effectiveness. I've been worried ever since I found out I needed surgery if it would aggravate my lower back (have herniation and disk degeration in between the last vertebrae). Throughout most of this recovery and all the sitting and crutching lopsided ... I've had zero back issues. However, the past 4-5 weeks it has been awful. I'm hoping we can get to the bottom of this very soon ... I really need a good, solid nights sleep!!!
Physical therapy continues to progress, except of course those exercises that nearly kill my groin area where the hip flexor is. This past Thursday she took new measurements and tested my strength. Some leg muscles are stronger than others, but it was nice to see that my gluts seem to be the strongest! I was lying on my stomach and doing a straight leg lift upwards while she was trying to push my leg down. She was unsuccessful, and even said "wow! Buns of steel!"! I think I would definately be able to walk unassisted now; moreso than where I was a month ago.
Range of motion is definately an issue. My right knee aches to high heavens when I cross it over my left to put a sock on. I've also noticed I can't bend down as far as I used to (from a sitting position) without feeling some outer/back/side hip pains (like needle sticks). Finally, it seems that the more up and down I'm doing, like on Saturdays like today when I'm trying to take care of the kids, pick up the house, tend to the kids/break up arguments ... My entire right leg was cramping. Is this normal?? Is it just the cold damp weather??
With the cold weather moving into middle TN, so has illness. Almost the entire family has been coughing for a minimum of 2 weeks, my daughter has an ear infection, and we've also had some stomach bug things going on. No fun!
It has been nice driving these past 3 weeks. Mobility has been such a blessing and relief both on me as well as my husband I'm sure. I've also figured out a system whereby I can use my shower! I park the walker right by the shower, back into it, and swivel/pivot on my left foot to get to the middle of the shower stall. It has worked well, except my back is killing me when I sit down at my vanity to finish drying off.
Now if I can just get rid of this last crutch. I'm hoping and praying the bones have finished healing come Monday morning, but everyone heals at different paces and only the xrays will tell for sure.
Let's hope my next post is a more positive one!!
Lori
-- Post From My iPhone
Monday, October 19th I see Dr. Kregor for my 12.5 week follow up. At this point I'm probably 75% weight bearing, via one crutch, and hoping Mondays xrays show the bone breaks have finally healed.
It has been amazing to walk with no hip pain or discomfort whatsoever. What was not expected was the continued hip flexor muscle pain I feel when lifting my leg to get it into the car, into bed, or when trying to cross my leg to put a sock on.
I also continue to be plagued with unbearable low back pain after standing for more than 5 minutes, changing positions in bed at night, and sitting up after I've been lying down. I started taking Mobic for a week, an anti-inflammatory friend of mine that I take whenever sciatic nerve pain pops up unexpectedly, but it doesn't seem to be doing any good. I am not having any sciatic nerve pain, just total lumbar pain from left to right and everything inbetween. The mobic I have is a year or two old ... Wonder if that has something to do with the lack of effectiveness. I've been worried ever since I found out I needed surgery if it would aggravate my lower back (have herniation and disk degeration in between the last vertebrae). Throughout most of this recovery and all the sitting and crutching lopsided ... I've had zero back issues. However, the past 4-5 weeks it has been awful. I'm hoping we can get to the bottom of this very soon ... I really need a good, solid nights sleep!!!
Physical therapy continues to progress, except of course those exercises that nearly kill my groin area where the hip flexor is. This past Thursday she took new measurements and tested my strength. Some leg muscles are stronger than others, but it was nice to see that my gluts seem to be the strongest! I was lying on my stomach and doing a straight leg lift upwards while she was trying to push my leg down. She was unsuccessful, and even said "wow! Buns of steel!"! I think I would definately be able to walk unassisted now; moreso than where I was a month ago.
Range of motion is definately an issue. My right knee aches to high heavens when I cross it over my left to put a sock on. I've also noticed I can't bend down as far as I used to (from a sitting position) without feeling some outer/back/side hip pains (like needle sticks). Finally, it seems that the more up and down I'm doing, like on Saturdays like today when I'm trying to take care of the kids, pick up the house, tend to the kids/break up arguments ... My entire right leg was cramping. Is this normal?? Is it just the cold damp weather??
With the cold weather moving into middle TN, so has illness. Almost the entire family has been coughing for a minimum of 2 weeks, my daughter has an ear infection, and we've also had some stomach bug things going on. No fun!
It has been nice driving these past 3 weeks. Mobility has been such a blessing and relief both on me as well as my husband I'm sure. I've also figured out a system whereby I can use my shower! I park the walker right by the shower, back into it, and swivel/pivot on my left foot to get to the middle of the shower stall. It has worked well, except my back is killing me when I sit down at my vanity to finish drying off.
Now if I can just get rid of this last crutch. I'm hoping and praying the bones have finished healing come Monday morning, but everyone heals at different paces and only the xrays will tell for sure.
Let's hope my next post is a more positive one!!
Lori
-- Post From My iPhone
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Wow ... over 10 weeks since surgery!
My blogging pace is slowing down! I've been back to work for 2 full weeks now, so I have had NO time for updates! I have 2 major initiatives going on at work, so that on top of just being exhausted and keeping up with the family has kept all my attention lately.
Just a few quick updates. I'm still progressing well with PT (2x week) and am using anywhere from 2-5lb weights on my ankles during most exercises. I am able to do more straight leg lifts each time (even though I'm only up to doing 2 sets of 5 lying down, and can do 2 sets of 10 lying on my side). I'm also progressively putting a little more weight on my right leg as I'm crutching and have NO signs of the same pain I felt prior to surgery!
Now that I have nearly weened my self off pain meds (which was no small feat for me), I'm really feeling the twinges, pangs, muscle soreness, etc. that are going on since they are no longer masked by medication. Most of the time these things are mildly discomforting (such as the twingy pains on the outside of my right thigh as the nerves are healing, the continued mild-to-moderate hip flexor pain in the groin area). After PT though, the muscle soreness and cramping in my leg is most uncomfortable. Of course none of this compares to the blinding pain in my lower back that I have after lying in ANY position for any amount of time, or when standing too long, or sitting in too soft a chair/sofa for any length of time. I wish I knew why ... Either way, I'm not sleeping well and waking up every 1-1.5 hours unless I take a small dose of meds, then I can at least get 2-3 hours of sleep before waking up ... and even then can usually manage to fall back to sleep after that.
I've also started having pain in my right knee. I mentioned this to my PT lady and she thinks if we work on my quads a little more, this may help my knee get used to having weight on it again. With all these various pains/cramps/discomforts ... I'm still thanking my Heavenly Father that my "good" hip is NOT giving me any trouble right now!! I sure hope it stays that way -I honestly could not go through this again.
I haven't been back to church on Sunday morning in probably a month. It was just too hard to orchestrate (and hard on me mentally) to have the family pushing me around in a wheelchair. I went back yesterday, only on crutches, so that was nice. My back (and for the first time, the back of my hip) was telling me perhaps it was too much right now.
Well, I see Dr. Kregor on October 19th and will be roughly 75% weight bearing by then. Sure hope there is light at the end of the tunnel ... I want nothing more than to ditch the wheelchair, walker, hospital bed and crutches!!!! I'm worried about the bones healing though. Only xrays will show, but as of the past several days I've had some stabbing pains right where (what feels like) the screws are. I hope my tossing and turning in bed has not wiggled a screw loose!
Until next time,
Lori
I've also started having pain in my right knee. I mentioned this to my PT lady and she thinks if we work on my quads a little more, this may help my knee get used to having weight on it again. With all these various pains/cramps/discomforts ... I'm still thanking my Heavenly Father that my "good" hip is NOT giving me any trouble right now!! I sure hope it stays that way -I honestly could not go through this again.
I haven't been back to church on Sunday morning in probably a month. It was just too hard to orchestrate (and hard on me mentally) to have the family pushing me around in a wheelchair. I went back yesterday, only on crutches, so that was nice. My back (and for the first time, the back of my hip) was telling me perhaps it was too much right now.
Well, I see Dr. Kregor on October 19th and will be roughly 75% weight bearing by then. Sure hope there is light at the end of the tunnel ... I want nothing more than to ditch the wheelchair, walker, hospital bed and crutches!!!! I'm worried about the bones healing though. Only xrays will show, but as of the past several days I've had some stabbing pains right where (what feels like) the screws are. I hope my tossing and turning in bed has not wiggled a screw loose!
Until next time,
Lori
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
8 1/2 week Follow-Up results
Greetings everyone.
Yesterday I had my check-up with Dr. Kregor. The breaks in the hip bone are healing well, with the exception of one of the major breaks which "still has some healing to be done". He re-checked the swelling in my right leg (and I'm happy to report that the unbelievable swelling in my foot/ankle that I've been fighting with for the last month is 99% gone!), and he noticed I still have swelling around my calf. I went this morning back to Vanderbilt to have another dopplar ultrasound done on my right lower extremity to look for blood clots, and everything was free and clear.
I am allowed to progress from toe-touch weight bearing to 20%, and very gradually increase from there over the next 4 weeks until I see him again. I'm to continue PT 2x week as well, and can drive in 3 weeks.
I have to admit I was not in a good mood yesterday as I went into the office, as I was hoping (prematurely) to be permitted to do 50% PLUS weight bearing and perhaps only use 1 crutch or a cane. I knew deep down that the xrays would be the determining factor of how much weight I would be to bear, so knowing the bones still need to heal ... I have to suck it up and be patient while that happens. The last thing I want is for the healing to not happen the way it should, and possibly have problems later. I definitely don't want to go through that again!! :-)
So I will go back to PT starting this Thursday. I'm also going into the office pretty much every day, granted a little late on PT days, and was given the ok to return to a full work schedule. It's really good to be able to see the team on a daily basis now, and with all the work on my plate it's also been easier than I thought to cut way back on my pain meds (which I'm trying to ween off of). Once I'm down to only taking pain meds before bed, this will help clear me to drive. Pain wise I'm doing really well, just have muscle soreness in the hip flexors from time to time.
I've enjoyed watching the emails fly on the "hipwomen" Yahoo! group I'm now a member of. Lots of women who are just about to go through a PAO, and others who are recovering like I am. I've seen folks asking questions about the same things I'm going through, and I've also seen questions fly by about problems or issues that I (thankfully) am NOT experiencing. I wish I would have found this group earlier on - I think I may have been more emotionally prepared for the recovery ahead than I was.
So when I'm crutching around, I'm letting my foot touch the ground and letting my leg "go through the motions" of walking. I honestly can't tell what percentage of weight I'm putting on it yet, probably 5% or less, but I'm letting it go through the motions and will work with my physical therapist to ensure I'm using more weight, but just not too much to impede the healing of my hip bone. While at home, I will probably still use the wheelchair if I need both hands to do things in the kitchen like clean up. You can't do much of anything when you're on crutches.
John continues to chaperone both kids to school, me to work, and me to all my appointments. I can't wait to be able to drive again so I can help ease some of the load, and can actually feel like there is something I can do on my own ... without help.
Well, that's the latest.
Yesterday I had my check-up with Dr. Kregor. The breaks in the hip bone are healing well, with the exception of one of the major breaks which "still has some healing to be done". He re-checked the swelling in my right leg (and I'm happy to report that the unbelievable swelling in my foot/ankle that I've been fighting with for the last month is 99% gone!), and he noticed I still have swelling around my calf. I went this morning back to Vanderbilt to have another dopplar ultrasound done on my right lower extremity to look for blood clots, and everything was free and clear.
I am allowed to progress from toe-touch weight bearing to 20%, and very gradually increase from there over the next 4 weeks until I see him again. I'm to continue PT 2x week as well, and can drive in 3 weeks.
I have to admit I was not in a good mood yesterday as I went into the office, as I was hoping (prematurely) to be permitted to do 50% PLUS weight bearing and perhaps only use 1 crutch or a cane. I knew deep down that the xrays would be the determining factor of how much weight I would be to bear, so knowing the bones still need to heal ... I have to suck it up and be patient while that happens. The last thing I want is for the healing to not happen the way it should, and possibly have problems later. I definitely don't want to go through that again!! :-)
So I will go back to PT starting this Thursday. I'm also going into the office pretty much every day, granted a little late on PT days, and was given the ok to return to a full work schedule. It's really good to be able to see the team on a daily basis now, and with all the work on my plate it's also been easier than I thought to cut way back on my pain meds (which I'm trying to ween off of). Once I'm down to only taking pain meds before bed, this will help clear me to drive. Pain wise I'm doing really well, just have muscle soreness in the hip flexors from time to time.
I've enjoyed watching the emails fly on the "hipwomen" Yahoo! group I'm now a member of. Lots of women who are just about to go through a PAO, and others who are recovering like I am. I've seen folks asking questions about the same things I'm going through, and I've also seen questions fly by about problems or issues that I (thankfully) am NOT experiencing. I wish I would have found this group earlier on - I think I may have been more emotionally prepared for the recovery ahead than I was.
So when I'm crutching around, I'm letting my foot touch the ground and letting my leg "go through the motions" of walking. I honestly can't tell what percentage of weight I'm putting on it yet, probably 5% or less, but I'm letting it go through the motions and will work with my physical therapist to ensure I'm using more weight, but just not too much to impede the healing of my hip bone. While at home, I will probably still use the wheelchair if I need both hands to do things in the kitchen like clean up. You can't do much of anything when you're on crutches.
John continues to chaperone both kids to school, me to work, and me to all my appointments. I can't wait to be able to drive again so I can help ease some of the load, and can actually feel like there is something I can do on my own ... without help.
Well, that's the latest.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
A week from tomorrow - see Dr. Kregor again
One week from tomorrow I have my checkup with Dr. Kregor, whom I haven't really seen since my 2 week checkup. I have been going to PT twice a week, with orders for "making headway" towards a straight leg lift from the back, and a leg lift from the side. The good news is - I can actually do 2 sets of 5 leg lifts from the SIDE, however can barely get air under my heel when lying on my back. If my therapist gives me a little assistance, I can lift my leg farther. As mentioned in a previous post, I am anxious as all get out to begin weight bearing and weaning myself away from the wheelchair and start doing some actual walking with 2 legs.
My most successful exercises are when standing. Doing the "captain morgan" knee lift is going really well (can lift it to 90 degrees with very little discomfort), side/front/rear leg lifts are also pretty good and mobile. Lying on my side, the clam exercises are getting easier and they've even added a thera-band to apply resistance. Each time I go to therapy, I also spend now 8 minutes on a stationary bike (with no resistance) and can pedal in circles with no pain. Last Friday was the first time they increased the timer from 5 to 8 minutes and my legs were a little bit tired, but not too bad.
During the day pain is not bad at all, other than my hands, fingers, etc. who have been compensating for my leg/hip these past 7 weeks. My only complaint is my hip flexor - on the center/inside area of my groin when I do exercises lying down or sitting down. The rest of my muscles (quads, glutts, hamstrings) are still very weak, but improving a little week by week.
I have now joined a Yahoo group for "hipwomen". I for once feel not quite so alone in this journey, but have to admit I'm jealous of many women whose surgeons allow weight bearing right after surgery!! I trust Dr. Kregor though and his direction, but am really hoping for some relief from my lack of independence and isolation next time I see him. My kids really miss me going upstairs to tuck them in, they miss me going to the playground with them, pushing them on the swings, taking them to school ... and I miss most of all not sleeping in my own bed with my husband and having quiet un-interrupted nighttime conversations!!! He has truly been my rock and my stability since the surgery. I don't know how he has kept his sanity as well as he has, but I would be amiss to not mention that he is an absolute miracle and blessing in my life. I don't know WHAT I would do without him. I love you, John.
For those women who have already replied to my posts (either on the forum or on my blog), thank you soooooo much. I want to open up lines of communications in both directions, so I hope my experiences can help someone else who is beginning this journey!
My most successful exercises are when standing. Doing the "captain morgan" knee lift is going really well (can lift it to 90 degrees with very little discomfort), side/front/rear leg lifts are also pretty good and mobile. Lying on my side, the clam exercises are getting easier and they've even added a thera-band to apply resistance. Each time I go to therapy, I also spend now 8 minutes on a stationary bike (with no resistance) and can pedal in circles with no pain. Last Friday was the first time they increased the timer from 5 to 8 minutes and my legs were a little bit tired, but not too bad.
During the day pain is not bad at all, other than my hands, fingers, etc. who have been compensating for my leg/hip these past 7 weeks. My only complaint is my hip flexor - on the center/inside area of my groin when I do exercises lying down or sitting down. The rest of my muscles (quads, glutts, hamstrings) are still very weak, but improving a little week by week.
I have now joined a Yahoo group for "hipwomen". I for once feel not quite so alone in this journey, but have to admit I'm jealous of many women whose surgeons allow weight bearing right after surgery!! I trust Dr. Kregor though and his direction, but am really hoping for some relief from my lack of independence and isolation next time I see him. My kids really miss me going upstairs to tuck them in, they miss me going to the playground with them, pushing them on the swings, taking them to school ... and I miss most of all not sleeping in my own bed with my husband and having quiet un-interrupted nighttime conversations!!! He has truly been my rock and my stability since the surgery. I don't know how he has kept his sanity as well as he has, but I would be amiss to not mention that he is an absolute miracle and blessing in my life. I don't know WHAT I would do without him. I love you, John.
For those women who have already replied to my posts (either on the forum or on my blog), thank you soooooo much. I want to open up lines of communications in both directions, so I hope my experiences can help someone else who is beginning this journey!
Friday, September 4, 2009
Getting anxious ...
I have begun surfing the web and catching up on other PAO blogs. I'm nearly 2 weeks away from seeing Dr. Kregor again for my 8+ week checkup, so I'm getting anxious and I have a million things running through my head right now. Will he allow at least partial weight bearing? Will he allow me to drive (at least a LITTLE bit)? Will he be pleased with my physical therapy progress? Or, will he say my hip flexor muscles just aren't strong enough, stay as you are for another month??? I have no way of knowing what this appointment will have in store for me.
Just as a recap, here's where I am (and will continue to be for another 2 weeks):
My 5 and a half year old son has asked me several times lately when I'll be better again so I can go to the pool with him. I guess it's a good thing that our pool closes after this weekend. My 3 year old daughter also asks when I'm going to be better and walking, though she isn't old enough to articulate why. I get the impression she just doesn't like to see me like this, and doesn't like to see me cry. There were quite a few times over the past 2 weeks where I would break down and cry out of frustration because of the things I can't do, can't reach, or when I've forgotten to do things. One such event I had forgotten about was a banquet at church for those who were leaders in our choirs at church. It totally slipped my mind and when I realized it, John was at my son's school for a parent/teacher thing and even if I could have gotten ready in time, had no way to get downtown to church. I bursted out into tears when someone from church called me asking if I was coming - and I said I forgot - and had NO way of getting there. The kids were very concerned, and I honestly try NEVER to cry in front of them. My son said "will they have a banquet next year?". I said yes, but that this was my first invitation to this banquet since I just started as a leader for our 1st grade choir, and he said "well, then next year will be your 1st year to go then!". I told him that this was my fault and that I was just upset that I had let this slip my mind, and he so sweetly said "but mommy it's nobody's fault". I couldn't believe how sweet he was being and how he was trying to rationalize the situation. I love these kids ...
For anyone reading this, sorry for the long post. Hopefully you're still awake! :-) I'm going to look online for other PAO blogs and see if I can make some contacts with people. I'd love to understand the various ways people are being instructed in their recovery. The one thing I hope Dr. Kregor DOESN'T say in 2 weeks is that I'm clear to use crutches and come back in a month. I will have to politely spill the beans that I HAVE been using crutches a little, and to throw me a bone!!! I'd love NOTHING more than to at least do a little driving ... but I have to watch myself and not get my hopes up.
I just wish I knew what was going to happen ... what he is going to say ... what the rest of this recovery is going to look like ... I guess I can try to be thankful that my left hip is doing great and probably will never need a PAO. I doubt I could go through this again.
Just as a recap, here's where I am (and will continue to be for another 2 weeks):
- I still use a wheelchair at home and when I go to church
- I use crutches to get into the bathroom (I hope this won't cause controversy. Dr. Kregor never said I could use them, but honestly ... how am I supposed to get down the stairs in the garage in order to get to the car for PT and church??)
- I use the walker in the bathroom when I'm bathing/getting ready (it's more stable, if I loose my balance ... and it helps provide me with stability getting in and out of the tub)
- I use a shower bench in the tub with a wand to bathe
- Primarily sleep on the hospital bed downstairs (because it's closer to the bathroom, it's easier to get in and out of ... meaning closer to the ground, I can adjust the feet/head to help make me more comfortable, and it doesn't require me to crutch upstairs)
- Still taking Lortab every 4 hours, and HAVE to stay on a 4 hour schedule or I feel the pain setting in (I think the pain is more my hip flexors screaming at me, versus actual hip "joint" pain).
- Have to set the alarm on my iPhone to wake up every 4 hours during the night to take the Lortab. I have been slacking on this lately. I find it pointless to keep myself awake to take 2 huge horse pills only to go back to sleep. Well, if I don't ... I will wake up at 2:30am in writhing pain and won't be able to move to even get to the bathroom. So, I need to get better at this.
- I'm working via laptop (and on the couch) up to 5 hours per day (sometimes less, sometimes more). Good for the brain - I'm so glad I have an IT job and have a great team (and boss) to allow this flexibility.
- Physical Therapy: Still going 2x a week. I'm starting to question my decision to do 2x week versus 3x. Yesterday I started off my therapy on a stationary bike!! No resistance of course. I was able to do an easy 5 minutes of rotation without issue! The bottom line is, I'm still weak. While I'm making progress each time, my hip flexors are still weak and I'm worried sick that this will keep me confined. I should have told them 3x week. Inside I think I was trying to not burden my husband by taking me 3x week, since he has to take both kids to their separate schools, then pick me up, then take me to therapy, then back home, then have him head to work. I'm trying to not burden him more than I already am. I just hope I haven't shot myself in the foot (no pun intended) and delayed my recovery by not pushing my therapy sessions. This means I need to buckle down HARD at home and really stay on top of my exercises to make up for it.
- Incision has healed nicely, though it's big and ugly. I still have swelling in my right foot, ankle, and leg ... but I think it's a little better from where it was a month ago. I think I still have some swelling in my right hip, based on how a pair of jeans felt Wednesday when I went to church for children's choir!
- My foot still turns red when I'm standing. I guess this is still normal as everything heals, and the bloodflow returns to normal circulation.
My 5 and a half year old son has asked me several times lately when I'll be better again so I can go to the pool with him. I guess it's a good thing that our pool closes after this weekend. My 3 year old daughter also asks when I'm going to be better and walking, though she isn't old enough to articulate why. I get the impression she just doesn't like to see me like this, and doesn't like to see me cry. There were quite a few times over the past 2 weeks where I would break down and cry out of frustration because of the things I can't do, can't reach, or when I've forgotten to do things. One such event I had forgotten about was a banquet at church for those who were leaders in our choirs at church. It totally slipped my mind and when I realized it, John was at my son's school for a parent/teacher thing and even if I could have gotten ready in time, had no way to get downtown to church. I bursted out into tears when someone from church called me asking if I was coming - and I said I forgot - and had NO way of getting there. The kids were very concerned, and I honestly try NEVER to cry in front of them. My son said "will they have a banquet next year?". I said yes, but that this was my first invitation to this banquet since I just started as a leader for our 1st grade choir, and he said "well, then next year will be your 1st year to go then!". I told him that this was my fault and that I was just upset that I had let this slip my mind, and he so sweetly said "but mommy it's nobody's fault". I couldn't believe how sweet he was being and how he was trying to rationalize the situation. I love these kids ...
For anyone reading this, sorry for the long post. Hopefully you're still awake! :-) I'm going to look online for other PAO blogs and see if I can make some contacts with people. I'd love to understand the various ways people are being instructed in their recovery. The one thing I hope Dr. Kregor DOESN'T say in 2 weeks is that I'm clear to use crutches and come back in a month. I will have to politely spill the beans that I HAVE been using crutches a little, and to throw me a bone!!! I'd love NOTHING more than to at least do a little driving ... but I have to watch myself and not get my hopes up.
I just wish I knew what was going to happen ... what he is going to say ... what the rest of this recovery is going to look like ... I guess I can try to be thankful that my left hip is doing great and probably will never need a PAO. I doubt I could go through this again.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
5 1/2 weeks post surgery
Well, not much new to report on the recovery front. I am becoming more proficient with crutches (although Dr. Kregor never told me I could use them!), which is good since crutches are the only way I can get down stairs to the car, and I can move more quickly on them than with a walker. I am still going to PT twice a week, and am steadily seeing progress on leg movements (such as raising my leg to a "captain" position, being able to increase my repetitions on original exercises such as the heel slides, etc.). I still have 3 whole weeks until I see Dr. Kregor again to determine what my next steps are.
I have made myself crutch upstairs to spend some time with the kids lately, and to also sleep in my own bed from time to time. The only problem with sleeping in my own bed is the pain. It is a bit difficult to maneuver pillows underneath my foot to raise it (still have some swelling going on), and my back gets very stiff and sore from lying flat. Our bed is also quite a bit higher off the ground than the medical bed downstairs, so it's harder getting in and out. Also, oddly enough, the toilet in our master bathroom is VERY low to the ground, actually lower than any other toilet. It's difficult in the middle of the night to carefully lower myself down with crutches. (probably more information than you readers care to know!) Nonetheless, there is nothing better than having a nice casual conversation with your husband right before you fall asleep. That makes all the pain and discomfort worth it.
I'm still bathing on the stool in the tub downstairs, using a shower wand. I have a system down now, between getting everything (towel, clothes) set up and within reaching distance beforehand, and the whole routine of getting ready. I have managed not to fall or slip, so I guess all this planning is paying off. I can manage to get pants/shorts on by myself now - meaning I can reach (or bend at the waist) much more easily now. I still have trouble getting socks on my right foot. There is intense pain in my hip when I bend forward and then turn my foot outwards. OUCH! I can at least hook the sock over my toe, then put my foot on the floor and pull the sock on while bent at the waist ... ok, nevermind ... it's just really hard!!
This past week there were 2 huge exciting events. Wednesday was the big kickoff for the children's music and missions program at our church, where I'm one of the leaders for our 1st grade choir! It was hectic. We had pictures, a parade inside the church, and I was back and forth between the wheelchair and crutches ... depending on which part of the church I was in. It was so great to meet a new bunch of 1st graders! Then on Friday, I planned on making a trip to the office to see the crew. It was completely and totally awesome to see my co-workers and the new space we moved into a month ago. The team had unpacked my desk and my pictures, had a group card sitting on my monitor, a plate of homemade chocolate brownies that Edwina made, and it was just so great to be there. I had planned on having John pick me up around lunchtime, but decided not to call him for a lift until around 4:30. :-) He had decided to take the day off, so knowing he was having a "recharge" day just doing whatever he wanted to do ... I hated to interrupt! Plus, I was actually having fun being in the office and felt I was more productive than working at home. Since I had gone 100% on crutches, I was totally beat when I left. I was definitely wishing I had brought the wheelchair.
Oh - and also on Friday, we get an email from John's mom who said she would love to keep the kids for a few hours some night this weekend if we wanted to go out. SERIOUSLY!?!?!?!? We took her up on it ... Saturday night we dropped them off, went to Cheesecake Factory, avoided the cheesecake (we were stuffed!), and then decided to try and kill some time by walking around Green Hills mall. Problem ... forgot the wheelchair. I wanted nothing more than to go by the Coldwater Creek store but absolutely could not crutch that far. My stomach was just in knots over this - couldn't believe I didn't bring the wheelchair. I also failed to mention that just before we left the restaurant, I was walking out of the restroom (marble floor) and there was something slippery on the floor. My right crutch (reminder - right hip was operated on) slipped outwards and of course to catch my balance I put weight on my right leg. I don't think it was full weight yet more than I've put on it yet. I did step outwards quite a ways on the right leg ... and it didn't feel good!!
So, PT tomorrow morning, and again on Thursday, then again for the next 2 Monday's and Thursday's. The hardest part is the status quo of this recovery. I have read other blogs where by this point some have been able to do 25% weight bearing, or are doing ankle weights or elliptical machines ... I'm not one who can be patient with the "status quo". Anyone who has worked with me professionally knows I get bored easily if I'm doing the same thing day in and day out with no accomplishments, no goal to work towards, and no challenge. While I'm seeing minor improvements with PT in lifting my leg while standing, I guess I'm wanting something more significant to make me feel like there will be a light at the end of this seemingly loooong tunnel.
I have made myself crutch upstairs to spend some time with the kids lately, and to also sleep in my own bed from time to time. The only problem with sleeping in my own bed is the pain. It is a bit difficult to maneuver pillows underneath my foot to raise it (still have some swelling going on), and my back gets very stiff and sore from lying flat. Our bed is also quite a bit higher off the ground than the medical bed downstairs, so it's harder getting in and out. Also, oddly enough, the toilet in our master bathroom is VERY low to the ground, actually lower than any other toilet. It's difficult in the middle of the night to carefully lower myself down with crutches. (probably more information than you readers care to know!) Nonetheless, there is nothing better than having a nice casual conversation with your husband right before you fall asleep. That makes all the pain and discomfort worth it.
I'm still bathing on the stool in the tub downstairs, using a shower wand. I have a system down now, between getting everything (towel, clothes) set up and within reaching distance beforehand, and the whole routine of getting ready. I have managed not to fall or slip, so I guess all this planning is paying off. I can manage to get pants/shorts on by myself now - meaning I can reach (or bend at the waist) much more easily now. I still have trouble getting socks on my right foot. There is intense pain in my hip when I bend forward and then turn my foot outwards. OUCH! I can at least hook the sock over my toe, then put my foot on the floor and pull the sock on while bent at the waist ... ok, nevermind ... it's just really hard!!
This past week there were 2 huge exciting events. Wednesday was the big kickoff for the children's music and missions program at our church, where I'm one of the leaders for our 1st grade choir! It was hectic. We had pictures, a parade inside the church, and I was back and forth between the wheelchair and crutches ... depending on which part of the church I was in. It was so great to meet a new bunch of 1st graders! Then on Friday, I planned on making a trip to the office to see the crew. It was completely and totally awesome to see my co-workers and the new space we moved into a month ago. The team had unpacked my desk and my pictures, had a group card sitting on my monitor, a plate of homemade chocolate brownies that Edwina made, and it was just so great to be there. I had planned on having John pick me up around lunchtime, but decided not to call him for a lift until around 4:30. :-) He had decided to take the day off, so knowing he was having a "recharge" day just doing whatever he wanted to do ... I hated to interrupt! Plus, I was actually having fun being in the office and felt I was more productive than working at home. Since I had gone 100% on crutches, I was totally beat when I left. I was definitely wishing I had brought the wheelchair.
Oh - and also on Friday, we get an email from John's mom who said she would love to keep the kids for a few hours some night this weekend if we wanted to go out. SERIOUSLY!?!?!?!? We took her up on it ... Saturday night we dropped them off, went to Cheesecake Factory, avoided the cheesecake (we were stuffed!), and then decided to try and kill some time by walking around Green Hills mall. Problem ... forgot the wheelchair. I wanted nothing more than to go by the Coldwater Creek store but absolutely could not crutch that far. My stomach was just in knots over this - couldn't believe I didn't bring the wheelchair. I also failed to mention that just before we left the restaurant, I was walking out of the restroom (marble floor) and there was something slippery on the floor. My right crutch (reminder - right hip was operated on) slipped outwards and of course to catch my balance I put weight on my right leg. I don't think it was full weight yet more than I've put on it yet. I did step outwards quite a ways on the right leg ... and it didn't feel good!!
So, PT tomorrow morning, and again on Thursday, then again for the next 2 Monday's and Thursday's. The hardest part is the status quo of this recovery. I have read other blogs where by this point some have been able to do 25% weight bearing, or are doing ankle weights or elliptical machines ... I'm not one who can be patient with the "status quo". Anyone who has worked with me professionally knows I get bored easily if I'm doing the same thing day in and day out with no accomplishments, no goal to work towards, and no challenge. While I'm seeing minor improvements with PT in lifting my leg while standing, I guess I'm wanting something more significant to make me feel like there will be a light at the end of this seemingly loooong tunnel.
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